My dh and I were lying in bed the other day chatting about nothing in particular. I guess my mind was wondering because he asked me what was up.
I told him about how I could not stop thinking about how we are so close to meeting our daughter, so close to meeting this little one who we have prayed for and missed for all these years.
We talked about our journey and how difficult and scary it was at times-not knowing when/how our family would grow.
The one thing we knew of was that we trusted that it would grow somehow-whether adoption or conception.
But that waiting and the not knowing...that was hard.
So unbelievably hard.
So hard that words could never do justice what it was like.
But then, my dh started describing how God gives couples time alone...just the two of them, and how most couples seem to get that time later in life, after their little ones are grown and moving out.
Then he said, "God gave us our time at the beginning of our marriage. And I know that our marriage is 100% stronger for that."
Hearing him say those words, of course, brought tears to my eyes. I couldn't agree more with what he said and the most amazing part about it is that, in the midst of talking about the pain of waiting and not knowing, he was seeing something beautiful...a gift from God...alone time that allowed him and I to grow and learn from.
He's always had such a great outlook on our IF struggle (which he said he'll blog about here at one point!!!)...sure he hurt and got mad, but his faith never wavered and he trusted.
He was definitely my anchor during months when I felt so lost or so down.
So, sure we didn't get a surprise honeymoon baby, or a BFP 6 months later after our first doctor's appointment, over 5 years ago...but what God has given to me, an amazing, faith-filled husband, is something I will always feel beyond grateful for.
"A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person." [Mignon McLaughlin]
I love the quote at the end. So true! My DH has been a lot like yours. I am so thankful for good husbands! This Christmas I had such high hopes for us but AF decided to drop in unwelcomed. I am so glad your wait is almost over.
ReplyDeleteDM+AM: I'm so sorry to hear AF showed...a definite unwelcomed guest anytime, but during the holidays, even more so!!! I'm praying that this year is filled with many blessings and lots of hope.
DeleteWow! I love this point of view!
ReplyDeleteWaiting is indescribably hard, that's for sure. I always think, I could have waited better / been more patient if I knew when. Wishing many blessings your way!!!
AIHPT: true story on the waiting. There were times I look back at it all and think, "wow-I deserve a high five for handling that so well" and then there's times where I look back and think, "fail...." But we can't change that now, only learn from it!
ReplyDeleteHAPPY New Years to you and your beautiful little family!!!!
It is amazing how God has made my husband and I closer during this time of waiting! It truly is His grace! I try to cherish every moment with my husband even those difficult moments of waiting, at least we are together. Prayers for you as you get closer to meeting your little girl! Ahhhh, how exciting :D
ReplyDeleteI can agree with your DH and his point of view. I love the time that Matt and I had just the 2 of us and while I am over the moon excited for her arrival I did love having one more Christmas just the 2 of us.
ReplyDeleteYes, so true!! My faith and my marriage would not be what they are if it weren't for IF.
ReplyDeleteI am getting SOOOO excited for you!! You have no idea what's coming! :) Every day I love it more.
That is a wise man your DH. Long before we ever knew that IF would be a part of our road, when we were struggling with other things (that seemed so so big at the time, but seem so small now in comparison) The Man would always say to me "we've got all we need, you and me, that's all we need to be happy." How I cling to those words these days, and I can see how much they give The Man peace as well.
ReplyDeleteLadies-we are def blessed to have our husbands throughout the difficult times...especially when struggling with IF. So even in the midst of the tough times, remembering their love and support and cherishing them is a must!
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