12 DPO

Tonight, like most nights when my husband works, I had trouble sleeping, so I stayed up and watched a movie. While watching, thoughts would race about the "possibility of pregnancy" and so forth. It's really hard to concentrate during this dreaded 2WW, but most of you guys already know this. Today, I had pretty much felt the same, ie: sore boobs, emotional, and cramping. Those dreaded could be this or could be that symptoms...

Well, after the movie I thought, "heck it's after midnight, so technically 13 dpo so why not test again!?". Before going, I decide that I would offer up a quick prayer because if I saw another negative I had to remember to trust. Full of hope I go and grab one of my books that I find so many great quotes from (He and I) and asked the Lord to give me some inspiration. I prayed he would lead me to the exact page and phrase that he wanted. Then I opened and read this:

"Repeat this often; 'Father, may your will be done. May Your will be done..."

My heart started racing and I knew that's what He wanted me to see.

I then skip off to POAS, ok, not really skip but I'm not going to lie, I was rather excited.

I POAS and set it aside, wanting to wait the full 2 minutes before peeking.

And as I'm finishing up and waiting, I notice something...

Spotting.

Yeah, my heart dropped.

I cried.

Then saw the big fat negative on my fancy shmancy dollar tree test and really started to cry.

So, AF may be making an entrance sooner than I thought. I know, "it's not over til it's over" ie, AF showing up, but I guess it's just hard to see the spotting right now because I wasn't expecting that at all.

"...Father, may Your will be done. May Your will be done..."