One door closes as another opens.

Today my heart is filled with both joy and sadness.

Short story of the sadness and door closing:
The young mother who was open to adoption and who we were thinking about adopting from, decided that drugs and alcohol were more important than having a baby.

I think she was nearly 4 months along and she aborted the baby.

My heart feels crushed because this situation brought so much excitement and joyful anticipation for both my dh and I.

But now, that baby is in heaven.

I have tears in my eyes as I type this. It's like I said before, whatever the outcome with the situation (this was before I found out about the abortion) I felt such a strong connection to this little soul and would pray for them and the mother.

I will still pray, but my heart is aching through the prayers because I would have done anything I could have to help that baby have a long and happy and loved life.

But it wasn't my choice.

Please pray for this young mom, M.

Now, as for the other door opening:
Well, I finally mustered up the courage to call PPVI today. I got the information I needed and got off the phone feeling SO excited and so JOYFUL that this was something that was going to bring good things for my dh and I.

That excitement was cut short because literally about 5 minutes after I called, my MIL called me with the sad news.

So many mixed emotions today, tears of sadness and heart break, mixed with a joyful anticipation for this next step in our fertility journey with PPVI.

I trust Him.

Even through the trusting, it still hurts though.
A lot.
My heart is broken.