There are no coincidences

Tonight, I was checking the mail and was beaming from ear to ear upon opening up our second letter from the Pope Paul Institute. I read where they want to start and couldn't help but be filled with joy and hope and excitement at the start of this new journey.

And them I opened up another piece of mail. From a dear friend of mine who is just as crazy as I am...but also a faithful individual who trusts in God.

She said she was in the bookstore and saw this and felt compelled to send it to me:

So not only did I receive my second letter from Omaha, in which I've been anxiously awaiting, I also received a sweet letter from a friend with a Saint Gerard prayer card and novena.

Not a coincidence.

And the thing is, these past few months I've felt extremely close to St. Gerard, hello best.dream.ever and I know that he's praying and interceding for us-this amazing timing just reassures what I've been feeling.

Looking forward to all God has in store for us!

"You're going to be a great mommy. I know. I believe it...I just can't wait to see it." [My amazing husband told me this the other day]

Remembering...

Don't forget to take a moment to remember all those that have fought and died so that we can be free...

"In case you thought it was national BBQ Day."

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Would y'all do me a favor?!

Please head on over to my beautiful, "fun sized," faith-filled, joy-loving, SIL's blog and wish her a very happy birthday!!! :)

And if you get a chance, please offer up a prayer that this year is filled with many blessings for her and my little brother!

E, looking forward to meeting up with everyone tomorrow for some yummy food, cowgirl boots and two stepping to celebrate the anniversary of your freaking life life! ;)

(I got the picture from pinterest and added my custom text! I'm so clever!)

"Birthdays...CELEBRATE them. Plain and simple. Whether you are 2 or 42. It's not a promotion...it's not a graduation...it's the ANNIVERSARY of freaking life!" [Kelle Hampton]

I'm sure y'all have heard this quote

But, it's been on my heart rather heavily lately, so I thought I would post it in case someone hasn't read it yet:

The English language lacks the words to mourn an absence. For the loss of a parent, grandparent, spouse, child or friend, we have all manner of words and phrases, some helpful some not. Still we are conditioned to say something, even if it is only “I’m sorry for your loss.” But for an absence, for someone who was never there at all, we are wordless to capture that particular emptiness. For those who deeply want children and are denied them, those missing babies hover like silent ephemeral shadows over their lives. Who can describe the feel of a tiny hand that is never held?"
[Former 1st Lady, Laura Bush]

I'll be honest...I've been missing and praying fervently for that little one from my dream...missing him so very badly, even though we've never actually met.

Dreams are amazing that they can do that. There are nights when right before I fall asleep I ask the Lord to bring me back there.

There's only been one other time, just a couple nights ago, that I dreamt about being a mom to that precious baby boy.

And what a beautiful, wonderful dream it was!

Some may not like dreaming-just ask my dh, he'll say he hates it...he wants a completely restful, dreamless night, but for me...I love them!!

By the way...all in all, I'm doing well...just soaking up time with nephews and nieces and anticipating (joyfully) celebrating our big 5th wedding anniversary (6/9).

Summer nails

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Quick question!

I had my laparoscopic surgery two years ago and have the scars (and somewhat regular cycle!) to prove it.

From time to time my belly button scar hurts...not like a super painful kinda hurt, more of a discomfort kind of hurt.

It doesn't happen that often really, maybe only a few times...like now, which is why I'm asking y'all if y'all have experienced this.

Or am I just weird?
Or going crazy?
Or maybe just both!


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God's gifts to us

Are everywhere.

But too often we are focused on the negative or busyness of life that we forget to slow down and see the beautiful picture He paints for us every single day.



I know I'm at fault, at times, when it comes to rushing through a day without taking time to thank God for the blessings in my life...

Like something as simple, but oh so grand, as the sky above!




"It's a beautiful day. Don't let it get away."

The first two pictures were ones i took of the sky these last few days and the last was found on pinterest.

You know you struggle with fertility when...

You go to the doctor's office to get some medicine for a sore throat and he prescribes amoxicillin and you get home and say to your dh:

"Hmm...last time I took this was a couple years ago to help with my cm (cervical muc.us)...maybe since the time I'll be taking it will coincide with the middle of my cycle, maybe just maybe it'll help with my crummy cm this time around! Double the duty for this antibiotic!!"


So yes, I an taking this, have been since last Wednesday and you know what?! I have seen SOOOOO much fertile cm its unreal. And seeing as I'm on/around CD12, this isn't too shabby for a girl who rarely sees anything!

And like I said, it's a lot-like the most I've ever seen ever-the stuff I've only ever heard about in books and online! ;)

Am I making y'all uncomfortable describing how beautiful and abundant my cm is?!

That's what's blogging is for...over sharing!

Anyways, it seems my little statement to my dh has turned out to be accurate!

Celebrating the little things...
Like good, great, awesome cm!!

Don't be jealous ladies.

It's true.
There, I said it.
Now, don't be hatin'!!

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Just a weird cycle

Bfn.
Shocking?
Not so much!
A little bit of hope right before the "not pregnant" happened?
Always.

I will admit, I didn't even consider testing because there were very few signs (practically none) that led me to thinking I could be pregnant, but I wanted to follow the advice of y'all, and I do not regret it.

It's always good to cross things off the list and come up with a definite conclusion...

And my definite conclusion is weird, weird cycle-my progesterone must be really low.

I'm so excited to start taking steps (bring on the medicineshotssonograms!!) to regulating these wonky hormones of mine!


“Patience is waiting. Not passively waiting. That is laziness. But to keep going when the going is hard and slow - that is patience.”


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Weird cycle

So, on April 25, I was on CD26 and I saw some fertile cm...but with it so late in my cycle, I didn't think much of it because I usually have a cycle ranging from 32-36 days long (yay pcos).

And then this past Thursday, I started cramping a little and had VL spotting, but not red...more of a pinkish color.

Then I thought it meant my period would start Friday but it didn't, just very light spotting, maybe only a handful of times throughout the day and literally only a spot or so.

Then the same thing yesterday except way less... I maybe only noticed it twice and it was the same light pinkish color.

And today I've noticed it only once.

It's quite frustrating because 1)this is turning out to be the longest cycle ever 2)I've never spotted like this with the anything other than red, that almost immediately followed with my period starting 3)why was the only time I saw some fertile cm this cycle, so late in the cycle 4)is my body quitting with the one thing that it was doing somewhat "normal"..ie:having a regular cycle each month?

I guess my surgery was almost 2 years ago, and although having regular periods was a huge plus from that surgery, maybe it's been too long and the effects from it are wearing off.

So, here I sit on cd37...wondering what the heck my body is doing...and thinking that working with dr. H in Omaha couldn't get here fast enough.

Oh wonky body/ovaries/cycle/hormones...





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