Yesterday I missed my day 9 of gratefulness but it was because it ended with me in the hospital...for the second time this week!
I mentioned a few days ago the reasons for my first visit and yesterday's visit was completely different.
This week has been tough actually, starting out with that first visit to the hospital, lack of sleep because I hadn't found a good sleeping position because of the pain I am feeling, and battling a cough that seems to get worst at night.
Thankfully Wed I discovered a way to get comfortable sleep wise (hello belly wedge pillow!) but that dang, annoying, tickle in my throat had me up every few hours trying to hack up a lung.
But, at least I was sleeping a little better so I didn't care about the wanting to hack up the lung part.
Onto yesterday-I was feeling so much better and was grateful that from Tue-thur all I had to do was rest and take it easy and get spoiled by my amazing dh (like previously mentioned!) so I decided I was feeling well enough to help my SIL out.
After helping my SIL with some stuff in the am, I decided that I could finally go out and shop for my shower dress (which is today!).
I noticed cramping and my lower back hurting a bit but didn't think much of it because I figured it was because it was my first day out all week.
I run to a couple stores, coming up with nothing but some cute little hostess gifts, and then decide to head to the mall.
I was feeling rather tired but was amped at the thought of finding a cute dress to wear to my shower!
First stop at the mall was the bathroom, of course.
It was then I noticed pink spotting on my underwear.
My heart starts to race a bit but I didn't freak out, thankfully.
Then I noticed more when I wiped.
I get a little more nervous but am still pretty rational and decide to call my doctor.
I called, answered questions and then was told to get to the maternal observation floor for them to figure out the cause of the bleed.
Here's where my calm, rational side sorta flys out the door...
I get off the phone, start walking through the mall, tears filling my eyes, hand rubbing my belly, frantically calling my husband.
I tell him what's going on-he says to "try and not worry, say and prayer and we will get to the hospital soon."
The tears continue until I get to my car when full out "oh my goodness dear Lord what's happening I don't know if I can handle this!!" mode started and I began to sob...
And beg God and the Blessed Mother to wrap their arms around our baby girl.
I begged him to protect her.
My mind raced with what could be wrong...with what I could have done.
I, by the grace of God made it home to my husband and we left for the hospital.
I had tears flowing.
He remained calm.
I was telling him I don't want to lose her or for something to be wrong with her or for my body to fail her.
He reminded me we were just in the hospital a few short days before that and she was healthy as can be.
By the time we got to the hospital, I was much calmer (although still nervous) by the help of lots of prayer and my dh.
We definitely compliment each other-for that I am so grateful.
First thing was hooking me up to the monitor: our little one sounded amazing and no contractions.
After a little observation we were then sent to L&D to meet with the doctor.
She did an exam to rule out preterm labor, checked my cervix, and did and internal exam to make sure baby was nice and high.
Everything checked out and I cried tears of joy. All I could say was "thank you Jesus! We've waited so long to meet this precious one, I just want her to be healthy!"
When she was examining me she discovered the source of my bleed-a polyp on my cervix. Something I had never heard of but something she said was common in pregnancy.
She was so sweet, as were all the staff we came in contact with, telling us this was a good thing, that we knew the source of the bleed and that everything looked great with our baby and me.
She then scheduled a ultrasound just for further verification that she was ok.
The ultrasound machine wasn't the best quality for pictures wise, but the doctor giving the ultrasound was amazing and checked out everything and our daughter looked great.
She Weighs about 2 pounds 4 ounces (just amazing!!!) and all major organs look and measured great.
After seeing her on ultrasound we were sent back to our room so I could get more blood drawn so that I could get the Rhogham (spelling?!) shot due to the bleeding and my being A- while dh is O+.
We left before midnight, grabbed a bite to eat and I instantly collapsed in bed from mental, emotional, and physical exhaustion.
Looking back at the day I wish I could have held it together and not broken down, but I was so fearful my body was causing our daughter harm somehow. IF has done this to me, I'm sure.
I'm grateful though that my dh was a steady presence throughout all of the chaos and of course, prayers helped too.
Prayer is such a powerful, unifying gift from our Lord.
And now today, today is my shower. The thing I've only ever been able to dream about and hope for the last five years.
The craziness of this week has left the shower off my mind somewhat so it doesn't even feel real.
It definitely hasn't sunk in yet. Maybe it will when I get there in a few hours.
Praying for a happy day, full of thanksgiving for the health of our baby and hoping I can sit back and truly soak up these moments and cherish these gifts I've waited so long for.
Thank you Jesus.
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13 comments:
so sorry you had to go through all that! Thank goodness everything is ok! Hang in there. Not too much longer!
Oh wow, I'm so glad you are all doing ok! ENJOY your shower... and please post pics!! ;)
I am so glad baby girl is ok! Thank God!
Wow! Praising God that everything is okay, and that they were on top of everything at the hospital for you and that your husband was so calming and steadying for you! Have a wonderful time at your shower today. :)
Oh J - I totally get this! I don't know if I wrote about all of my hospital visits, but I was there 4 times before I actually went in for labor. 1 time was bleeding at 20 weeks (complete freak out!!!), 1 time was for bad cramping at 24 weeks, 1 time was for thinking I was in pre-term labor because we thought my water broke, and another time for another case of bleeding. Ahhhh...each and every time I was so freaked out and I couldn't think straight and I so wanted everything to be okay. So, yeah, it is nervewracking, but I am glad you DH is so supportive and a great prayer partner. I will step up the prayers for you as I know how hard this is! Grow, baby Faith, grow, and just lay low and hang out until your mama is ready to deliver you, k? :)
Thankful everything is fine! :) Completely okay to stress about things like that. You handled it well in my opinion!
So glad to hear all is well - with baby and mama! Better to worry and all be well than to not and something be wrong.
Keeping you in my prayers.
I am glad baby Girl is ok and no problems. That Mama intuition is working in you ... I think when it comes to your babies it is hard not to get worked up.
Enjoy your shower!!!!! And yes, I'm dying to see pictures! :-)
Glad to hear everything is ok !
Frightening! So glad you are all okay.
JBTC: oh goodness...I didn't know all that!!! How hard each and every time must have been!!! Thank you for your prayers, and for sharing with me!
Thanks for the prayers ladies! It helps SO much. And as for pictures from my shower...those will come, my amazing SIL took some great pictures!
Oh how scary! SO glad everything is ok. Hope your shower was amazing!
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